Micro Poem Part 1

Sometimes a thought comes to mind. A random thought. Completely random. Sometimes relatable. Sometimes vague. It's a small thought which when nurtured with imagination, becomes a Micro Poem.

Here it goes Micro Poem Part 1.

In all the wrongs
His and hers
That defied them
Someone was right, and someone was fine.

There were tears
His and hers
That tore them
Some were wasted, and some were divine.

(P.S- More Micro Poems, Coming Soon!) 

© Written by Garima Mahajan

Perfect Parent!

Have you ever tried to measure 'parenting perfectionism'? Yes, there is a term like that. I  also did not know about it until I read this. It did strike me because I have encountered more than one instances of parenting perfectionism. 

I remember the initial frightening moments when the doctors gave me Ridhiema. I really did not know how to even hold her. Forget nursing her, changing diapers, making her sleep, understanding the difference between her wails. There were times when even parental support and google could not help.

I used to fret over every issue- giving formula milk, how to make her sleep, massaging her. I got panic heart once when I forgot to cut her nails! Just one very 'fine' day, I realised all this is taking a toll on me. I googled my symptoms (not Ridhiema's, for a change!) and that's when I came across the term- Parenting Perfectionism- holding oneself to impossibly high standards for parenting, to the extent believing that others hold you to impossibly high standards for parenting.

In my limited understanding of parenting and relationships, I have seen that the quest to be a perfect parent actually harms normal parenting. Parents who try to be perfect always end up showing less confidence in their roles as parents as compared to parents who accept their shortcomings and try to work things accordingly. How ironical is that while striving to be 'perfect parents', parents forget to become 'actual parents'. Worrying about what other parents' think of how they are as parents actually make their life more stressful and less enjoyable.

So fret not. Don't worry about little problems. Remember that it is the larger picture that is important. Also parents who post a lot of updates about their children on social media may not represent ideal parenting. What you see on social media is always not true. Even if it is true, it might not be complete.

Embrace your imperfection. While we must strive for perfection, we must remember that it is the excellency, and  not perfectionism that makes strong, smarter and happy children. The best you can do to yourself and to child is actually the acceptance of imperfection. 

© Written by Garima Mahajan

MOM (Mothers of Multitasking)

Is multi tasking the coolest thing to do? For someone as impatient as me, multi tasking is what gets me going. But also for someone as hyper active as me, multi tasking is what tires me the most! I'll give you an example. When I get up in the morning, I make a To-Do List in my mind. And while I am on task one, I am inclined to start the next task so as to reach to the third task.

Without sounding too pompous, I believe motherhood is synonymous to multi tasking. How else would you explain cooking, arranging stuff in kitchen, talking on the phone and keeping an eye on the toddler, all at the same time? And along with these activities, the mind is racing to washing clothes, evening class and an online deal that is still not out of mind!

Picture courtesy: Google Images

I believe mothers are very hardworking. They are like workhorses. They cook, clean the house, take care of the child, plan everything, administer the daily chores, organize everyone's lives, deal with family and extended family relatives, listen to all the problems of the children- from dirty diaper to hunger attack. Mothers do all this and more. Sometimes all this at once- without losing their sanity.  This is what serious multi tasking is all about.

So all the Managers and HR people who are reading this- HIRE A MOTHER! She is smarter and more qualified than what you can credit her for. Well her success in the past few years might be 'only' raising healthy children and happy family. But in all humility, there is nothing more difficult than raising healthy children and happy family.

Cheers to all the multi taskers. A double cheer to a multitasking mother. May you achieve higher index of happiness. Because at the end of the day, that's all that matters. Isn't it?

© Written by Garima Mahajan

His Daily Love

There are poems. And there are insta-poems. Insta-poems are those wee little raw, fresh poems. These are actual poems that fall somewhere between a prose and a poem. For me, it is more like a thought. 

Here goes an insta-poem. I wrote it sometime back. At that time, I could not think of a title for this. I found one today:



His Daily Love

Photo courtesy: Google Images

She was like a 'Rose' to him
He loved her with her 'thorns'
Every night he hated to let her go
And loved her more every dawn.


© Written by Garima Mahajan

Birthdays & More

We human beings are social by nature. Agree, not all of us. But most of us. I guess nobody wants to remain alone for a long period. And thanks to the 'awesome' network of social media around us, almost all of us are striving hard to get higher ranking on social media index. I am myself a social media addict. So this post is a special one, since it validates and strengthens my belief on real relationships vis-a-vis social relationships.

It was my birthday last week. And I changed my settings in such a way that Facebook does not send my birthday notification to my friends. As anticipated, there were very few wishes (on facebook). Quite frankly, I did give a thought on such an abysmal low count of birthday wishes on a social media platform. But wasn't this expected? Some hundreds of people wished me birthday last year because a notification was screaming on their screens. But this year, there was no such case. This year, all those people who remembered my special day wished me in person, either by meeting or phone call or through a message. Well honestly, I was glad that I did not have to reply to hundreds of messages! Don't get me wrong, but that's like a task. A big task.

Remember when we were kids? Or when we were in college? (Okay, young ones. My childhood and college days were in 90s and early 2000s) That was when social media did not bombard our lives There were just a handful of people who were close to us that cared to remember our birthdays. Come to think of it, what has changed since then? A handful is still a handful. Even at that time if there was an announcement of your birthday, you would have got hundreds or thousands of 'wishes'.

Thanks to our busy lives, sometimes we do not remember each other's special days. Social media and technology do come handy in such situations. But let's not get dependent on any kind of technology to such an extent that we lend our emotions and feelings to it as a storehouse for expressions.

I have no hard feelings for anyone who did not wish me. I still have the same love for all of those who did not wish me and trust me, this post is not a rant to express a displeasure. I am glad I have made beautiful relationships with beautiful people who would remember me- with or without social media.

Chocolate cake for me from Ridhiema's daddy

Fruit cake for daughter from Ridhiema's daddy 

                                                                 

                                                                                         

I had an awesome time and had some amazing food, cakes and chocolates. Wishes were few but love was in abundance.

Íf you love life, life will love you back.' So on that note, let's love the life that we have and the beautiful people it has!

© Written by Garima Mahajan

As I look forward, I turn back and smile

2015 happens to be the best year of my life. Trust me, I said the same for 2014! 2014 gave me my daughter Ridhiema. It had to be the best one. But 2015 gave me the lessons that I would give to Ridhiema. 2015 gave me experiences that I would cherish all my life. 2015 made me wiser, saner and calmer.

On 31st December 2015, like many of us, I was also introspecting the year gone by. It started by giving up on a ten year old job because my honesty and integrity was questioned. I became a Stay At Home Mother(SAHM)- a concept that was alien to me. I started valuing my time and worth more after I became at SAHM. It was not as easy as it is sounding, like reading the last two lines. But the whole experience of valuing time- mine and my child's- became the biggest advantage of being a SAHM.

I noticed changes in people's behaviour towards me after I quit my job. Not for once, I questioned my decision. But what puzzled me was the change in people's perception towards the same individual. It took me some time to understand and come to terms with the fact that I was not fired from my job. I quit it myself. For reasons that mattered to me. And once I came to terms with this reality, life was a lot easy.

I lost on important relationships. That too without closure or answers. But as the year ended, I learnt another lesson- even if I am gifted a box full of darkness, I must thank the giver. For without darkness, there is no value of light. Relationships that defy understanding, concern and respect do not need a closure or answer.

I saw many firsts this year. Ridhiema's first birthday, her first step, her first word, her first dance, her first attempt to eat all by herself. I saw all this and more. Sometimes in a fraction of second. Sometimes after persistent efforts. But all in all, for a new mother (not that new anymore, I know!), I learnt that life moves on. Sometimes it changes in a flash. And sometimes you need to see your child's outgrown clothes to see how much life has changed.

Advice- that's one word that comes free in this world. But like any other strong medicine, it offers relief (sometimes), it also offers some side-effect. 2015 made me wiser in terms of choosing people when it comes to advice. Because sometimes the side-effect is more dangerous than the relief!!

I also learnt that humor is the best stress buster. After music. And food. And dance. And long walk. And rain. See, I gave you advice on the stress buster! ;)

All in all, 2015 has been my favorite year (till now). I gave a beautiful goodbye to 2015 and now I look forward to 2016 with an open positive and happy heart.

Much love to everyone :))

© Written by Garima Mahajan

Wordless Post Part 13

After a long, long time, here is another Wordless Post. For hope, for death, and for rebirth.

उम्मीद का कोई रंग नहीं होता.. सब कुछ काला और सफ़ेद नहीं होता!!!

© Written by Garima Mahajan